Managing Authors’ Expectations
When my son was thirteen, he asked me, “Do you think I could be a professional skateboarder one day?” He was wide-eyed and hopeful, looking to me for encouragement and guidance.
As I thought about his question, Tony Hawk, one of the most famous skateboarders I know, came to mind. I wondered what Tony Hawk’s mother had said to him when he was younger – other than to be careful and wear a helmet. Though I wasn’t sure, I imagined she had been supportive and encouraging. I wanted to be supportive and encouraging, too.
Though I wanted my son to be inspired to follow his dreams, part of me was tempted to offer a pragmatic answer. Should I warn him of all the obstacles he might face should he choose this path? Does he have any idea how difficult it is to become famous? But, after careful consideration, I decided these points weren’t helpful. Surely, he would have plenty of people telling him the odds were against him, and he wouldn’t likely benefit from his mother being one more pessimist.
I turned to my son and said, “Anything is possible if you put your mind to it. As long as you practice, have a good attitude, and don’t give up, I don’t see why you couldn’t be a professional skateboarder.” His eyes lit up, he smiled from ear to ear, and then he ran outside to skateboard.
He wasn’t interested in a list of reasons why becoming a professional skateboarder would be difficult. He wanted to know that I believed in him. If one person believed in him, it would be easier for him to believe in himself. He wanted to know that his dream was possible and that it wasn’t foolish to dream big.
When aspiring writers ask me if I think it’s possible to make a living writing, I think of this discussion with my son. Though I’m tempted to manage their expectations, I’m more inclined to support them in following their dreams. I know it’s not my place to tell anyone what is and what is not possible. After all, I’m not an oracle. I don’t hold all the answers. I’m just another human trying to figure out life like everybody else.
So, rather than tell authors, “It’s a tough business,” instead, I say something similar to what I told my son. I tell them, “You have a great chance at a successful writing career if you keep the following in mind. Keep writing even when it’s difficult. Keep reading and educating yourself. Use feedback to help you improve, and most importantly, don’t give up.”
When I share this perspective with new writers, their spirits are lifted. Most have already been told that writing is difficult and that you can’t make money selling books. But, once they receive an alternative viewpoint, one that’s optimistic, they are encouraged to continue their writing journey.
Many people might consider this optimistic perspective a disservice to writers. Instead, they may believe that preparing new writers for the worst is best. While there may be some benefits to curbing one’s enthusiasm, I can’t think of many. I don’t think writers need any more negative feedback about how difficult it is to be a writer. I assure you, writers have already heard, “Publishing is tough, an MFA is a waste of money, or only a few authors will make it to the top.”
Before I embraced an optimistic mindset, I was guilty of telling new writers, “Beware.” One writer in particular was intent on writing and selling a poetry book. Knowing poetry is a hard sell, I felt obligated to warn him. I wanted to protect him from getting hurt should he get rejected, and I believed that preparing him for the worst was the best way to insulate him from potential failure.
Perhaps, subconsciously, I wanted to protect myself too. If I set the bar at a reasonable height, my efforts wouldn’t disappoint him if his book didn’t sell. Upon reflection, I regret not giving him the encouragement I now give writers. If I had been authentic and brave enough to be wrong, I would have told him anything is possible because, for me, this is true.
What’s wrong with thinking you have a good chance at success? I suppose indiscriminate optimism could prevent someone from growing and learning from their mistakes – this would be unfortunate. However, in my experience, most writers know their work needs improvement. I have yet to meet anyone who thinks every word they’ve written is flawless. Therefore, it seems favorable to offer optimism and encouragement to help bolster writers’ energy and motivation to continue writing, learning, and improving.
Do stories of failure and struggle serve writers? Don’t writers require a little grandiosity to attempt the arduous task of writing a book? Do you know of a writer intending to write a crappy novel? I’m guessing we all start out believing we can write a bestseller.
And, of course, those who have been writing long enough know that the balloon of optimism is guaranteed to pop at some point as uncertainty and doubt inevitably creep in. If writers didn’t have the thought, “I think this book could be the next bestseller,” few books would probably be written. Isn’t an optimistic attitude one of the most essential ingredients for success?
When I used to work in kitchens, it was well understood that attitude was everything. Techniques could be taught, knife skills could be learned, and recipes could be followed, but one’s attitude was innate. Attitude couldn’t be taught, and I have yet to meet an executive chef who tolerated anything other than a positive one. As long as someone remains positive and wants to learn and improve, success is always within reach.
I hope those working with aspiring writers will consider the benefits of providing encouragement and optimism over disheartening statistics. What would you say to that hopeful kid full of dreams who believes anything is possible? Adults still have that little kid inside them and need someone to believe in them, too. I’m guessing whatever you would say would be encouraging, which is what aspiring writers need to hear now more than ever.
